Hey Dai…. It’s Ming….
Dai (Chi), Wan & Ming... Click picture to enlarge.
Hey Dai. It’s Ming.
Am not sure if someone is reading this to you right now or godwilling this silly letter is traveling through time so you may be reading it in what for now is the future. Godspeed silly thoughts of mine and to your health little brother. So many things have happened in the last year since the accident. I’m not sure how much you remember or know at this point, since you still have no way of communicating with us. At this point it’s been almost 13months since the accident. Tried calling your cell phone just to hear your voice and leave a message like I’ve been doing, but it looks like they finally shut it off.
Christmas has come and gone and the new year is almost upon us. It nice here in Idaho. My old lady is the best. I used to hate holidays and birthdays, but the last 2years or so she has made them more than bearable and even a good experience. I don’t know why I hated them so much before. I used to go out of my way to work on my birthday and any other holidays.
I am still employed. Which while you’ve been “out of the office,” is almost the equivalent of saying “I’m one of the lucky ones,” even if your job is kind of shit and don’t pay much of shit.
I can’t tell you how happy I was to find out that you had grabbed the handrail of your bed and were trying to pull yourself up. Since I don’t get to see you everyday, I have to rely on Mae or Mom’s reports (more likely Gina 90% of the time) on how you’re doing. I wish I could make it out more, but I am trying to keep this job for what it’s worth and Sunshine is getting straight A’s in school. I’m obviously not a doctor, but all the time you’ve spent in various hospitals and places seem to have definitely taken their toll on you at this point. It’s hard for me to say it, but physically you seemed to be in way better shape a month after the accident than you were last month when I visited. Fucking insurance companies, godamn politics (and we’ll talk about this when you’re back to 100%.) and every other thing that has played a part in so many of the setbacks make it hard not to lose it.
I try not to get angry.
Initially I wanted to blame someone for the accident.
Ultimately, I guess I could only blame you for not wearing your seatbelt. But what’s the point now anyhow? As I try to make sense of this all a year later, I sometimes wonder if there is a God: Does he test the strongest ones? Lord knows you didn’t deserve this. So why? And how long is all this gonna take til you’re better? Why didn’t this happen or why didn’t they do that?…..I drive myself crazy if I let the “what ifs” and whatnots get the best of me. The hardest part (and yes I find the irony in telling “you” this) is understanding that things are not gonna happen when and how I want them to happen. None of us knows how long this will take or exactly how it’s gonna turn out. I can’t imagine how you are feeling, but I hope you are trying to stay positive, patient and remembering to meditate. You’ve been popping up in so many of my dreams lately that I don’t doubt you’ve been cruising other planes of existence and visiting us in dreams.
I know that with everything you’ve been through, it most likely would have killed anyone else. But I know instinctually, you have the will to survive. I sometime wonder if I was on the edge, how hard or if I would fight at all to come back to this world. I’m definitely not attached to this world, with the exception of family and a few friends.
In the meantime, this is me, your only older brother telling you to “Wake Up!” and let’s get it going!
One foot in front of the other!
You don’t give up on me and I don’t give up on you!
Man, get your ass back here already. God knows some of us that aren’t so strong need you. You’ve got the world pulling for you. I have been missing you a great deal, so I have no idea how Gabe may be feeling, but I imagine like you he’s a tough old soul. It doesn’t change the fact he needs you.
The website that Gina has put together for you has really shown me the good side in people. It’s amazing how many people have given what they can and how much you have touched people during your life. Mom has really taken a lot of comfort from other prayers and whatnot. Amazing how many people you “meet” online or otherwise, that were in a coma or have a relative coming out of one. We even lost a kid that had been praying for you in a very similar accident (rest in peace brother Marco). Last time I was down for a visit, I saw mom spends a lot of time with the fans and in the chat room. I tried the chat room thing twice, but it felt kind of strange to “talk” to people like that, much less a group of people. Verbal Orgy? I know it’s just that I’m weird. Nevertheless, I’m glad mom finds consolation in her newfound friends and am grateful to all of the “One Love Family.” Even though I’m still an isolationist, it’s good to see what I always know is true: Humans are in general good at the core. On a personal note, I don’t know what’s taking the mothership so long to find me. Nor at this point do I really care anymore. Despite all the suffering and confusion on this planet, I have come to peace with life here. As much as I’m gonna anyway.
Did I mention how much I miss you?
Did I tell you it’s time to quit fuckin’ around and “Wake Up!”
Seriously tho, I love you man. You are the closest thing to an older brother I’ve ever had. You’ve been my best friend for damn near 39 of the 40years I’ve been here. I’m trying to be patient and optimistic, I hope you are doing the same. I’m sorry if mom keeps playing the same 3cds, but there are some things in life you can’t control obviously. I look forward to the day when this is all just a part of the past that we can talk about. When we’re both grey and kids are running around calling us grandpa. I ain’t in a hurry, but time flies by. So wake up already.
Love,
-M.
p.s. Check out this pic my chica found laying around the folks house. I’m guessing it’s around 95’ by the hairdos.
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One Love!
All donations go 100% to Chi's care. Thank you so much for your love and support. One love for Chi, Gina
HEY MING
….Impressive….i m sure that Chi knows that we re all waiting for him….he will be back…we ll keep praying…HE WILL BE BACK SOON…
Dearest Ming, Happy New Year! I haven’t been to the computer much in the last week, but got up today to check our OneLove family and did read this to Dai. He started getting very loud, louder than he has been in a long time. He was either wanting to respond to you or complaining because Wan was clipping his fingernails, something which I’m sure was a first for Wan to be doing for someone else. Pak and Kari just came in also so the noise level is going steadily up. We miss you all and made a pact last night that 2010 will be a great year without anything but happy events. So any of you in our OneLove family, please share your happy events with us too…It does make our days better! Wishing you all a safe and happy 2010 also! Be sure to buckle up and stay safe! ONELOVE!! Mom
that is awesome momma! glad our brother is making some noise again!
love you.
one love for chi,
gina
I feel you Ming. I don’t know what to think about God anymore, I don’t know what to believe. Sometimes I think he’s just watching for his entertainment which makes me mad so I focus on being optimistic. I do believe positive and negative energy go around so I’m sending all mine to Chi and his loved ones.
The progress in Chi’s condition is not fast enough for us but it’s there; just don’t let go man!!
btw my spaceship is late…
Hey I would just tell you guys it’s encouraging to see all of the responses to Chi, whether we know him or not. I know in time of trauma God is the one who usually gets the blame card whether at the time of the traumas of life we believe in him or not. We dont live in a safe world, its fallen man. None of us can escape harm and we arent promised the next day. We may think we are untouchable, but tradgedy strikes and it sucks. God has not left this world, he actually desires to be in relationship with the world and that was done through Jesus with his death and resurrection for mankind. God has not abandoned his creation. He loves us, but there is suffering in life, thats why bad things happen. I am praying to God for Chi’s recovery because he is the one that gives us life and the very breath that we breath.
Awesome Ming! WAKE UP DAI!
NO QUIT CHI!!!
Matt
Beautiful letter, Ming! Made me laugh and cry reading it, as I suppose you did while writing it.
Wish you would visit here with us more often. We don’t bite, I promise!
Peace and Blessings to you in the coming year, Ming!
One Love For Chi!
-Bruce
That was amazing Ming! He will wake up!! Still praying!!!! Love you Chi! Wakey wakey!!
laura
Ming, you are cool. It is refreshing to see people love others, and I am happy for Chi and the rest of the family that you guys have love for one another. Gina is apart of that love, so when I say family yes I am talking about you Gina! Anyway, everything happens for a reason and Chi will and IS recovering. It may not happen as soon as we would like it to, but it’s coming. Keep the faith okay?
One Love, Forever and Always
thanks elaina.
one love for chi,
gina
Such a powerful letter. “wake up Chi the world needs people like you!”
Hey ming, your brother and his music had given me so much to live for, I would be gone if it weren’t for your brother in some part, I lost my dad in a wreck 11 years ago and I would not be here if it wasn’t for your brother and his other musical brothers, they have changed my mind more times than i can remember and he will come back to us and you and your family, much love brother
peace and much love
carl
gainesville, ga
I believe in hope, strength, and life. I’m sending all these via prayer to someone I’ve never met but I feel has given me so much. From all of us here in PA. God Bless.
Hey Ming,
I’ve been following the blogs and news and can only keep praying that Chi will recover soon. Hang in there yourself and I am very happy to hear there is positive progress in Chi’s recovery.
Take Care,
Mike Huebner (Riverwood Crew)
Hola Chi cuidate hermano y arta fuerza y fe para poder salir adelante ya que nos haces falta
te extrañamos aqui en Chile
te esperamos
abrazos
paz
Ming,
I worked with you at the EAT’M Festival back in 2000. Sorry to hear about your brother. My prayers are with you, the Cheng family, and especially for Chi. God Bless.
lol at grandma playing the same three CDs over and over. love you dad. love you/wake up dai <3
I’m of the agnostic persuasion but I have prayed for Chi’s well being just in case someone gets my message. Be strong my man, a stranger that cares is sending you strength from far away.
The fact that this site exists and that people are willing to support it really fills me with hope. This site is so positive and I appreciate that. Chi and his family are welcome in my home anytime and if me saying a prayer helps in anyway I’m happy to do it. With much love from the UK.
thanks so much. i am so glad now that i put it up. keep prayin.
one love for chi,
gina
Ming! Miss you man! Idaho eh? I’m in Montreal.
Think about you and your fam everyday..
Best,
Mikey B Rishwain