It’s been 4 and a half months since the accident. My brother has been to hell and I would say back, but he’s still kind of in a coma. I realize now that faith is something people either have or don’t when there is nothing else. I’m trying. To have faith that this will all turn out okay. To believe that Dai will be able to walk and talk again. But it’s trying. I do believe in a higher power(yes folks, it’s a 12step term) and like to believe that although I will never understand or know how or why terrible things happen to beautiful people-that it’s all part of some plan that makes sense. But as I am human, things like this are hard to understand.

Tragedy seems to bring out the best and worst in people. True colors for sure.

Jeff(Willhaven) and Alice have been like family members I never knew I had. Between the 3 shows that Jeff and Rey(Death Valley High)organized- they raised almost 10k. Money goes quick in these situations. A million dollars of health insurance went in about a week. I had never met Alice until after the accident, but she (and her man) have been with Dai practically every weekend. Although my brother still can’t walk or talk, I can see that he responds to her and has a crush on Alice. My mother and sister have pretty much kept a 24 hour vigil with him. My mom won permanent conservatorship over my brother. Thank god. Yes, she had to hire a lawyer and fight for it. In the end the other party settled for a monthly check. But in this case there wasn’t much to fight over. Just debt. I am gonna let the Karma snake take care of it. Oh, where was I. Oh giving thanks to all the other kind souls that have been there for my bro. A woman named Gina Blackmore set up this website and seems to have some kind of super time management, because she is always checking in with the family and working on ways to help. I’ve never even met this woman or talked to her on the phone. Amazing. My brothers 1st wife herein referred to as Adrock has been diligent about bringing his son every weekend to visit. And his son has been a trooper. I was there when my mom walked in with his son and announced he was here. Dai immediately opened his eyes and was looking at his son. He somehow knew exactly where he was in the room. I haven’t seen him focus on anyone like he does his son. His eyes almost seem to say “Be strong son, this too shall pass.” I could go on thanking everyone that has been instrumental in helping out: my family, B-low, Dingo Dave, Fieldy, defband and crue, all the staff and doctors, all the fans and kind souls that have reached out-hey I’m just gonna stop here. I can’t thank everyone- I will forget someone.

My brother had touched alot of people around the world and it shows. I’ve said it before and I will say it again. My brother is not a perfect person, but he has a perfect soul. Even though technically I’m the oldest, in alot of ways he was like the older brother I never had. It’s been nice to have a best friend my whole life. And since he’s between here and there, honestly it just breaks my heart. I had the urge to call him about 2months ago, and realized that, well. Yeah.

Well everyone has a story to tell. And there are things to be learned from this.

The obvious. Buckle up.

Next time you think you’re in love and want to marry someone, take your time. If it’s your whole life why rush in. I think it takes at least a couple years to start to get to truly know someone. And don’t forget, worst case scenario- realize that if you marry someone, they ultimately have the power to pull the plug on you if anything bad should happen.

Try to treat each other well. You never know when the last time you’ll see or talk to someone is. We’ve already lost 2 of the O.G. seven chinese brothers.

Don’t feel guilty about poor decisions others have made. Forgiveness is key to a healthy life. And I think for people like me, it’s mostly about learning to forgive yourself for the things ya may have screwed up. We can’t go back in time, but we can try to mend fences and learn from our mistakes.

Don’t worry or stress- I never heard someone say “I didn’t sleep at all night cause I was up worrying about yadayadayada…and all the stress and worrying seemed to have fixed everything.”

And maybe lastly, and this one can’t be that hard. Try to do the right things in life. Try to make good decisions. Try and be a good human being. We all play an intricate part in this stage we call “the world.”

Oh, and for the record- I don’t really know much about anything. As far as you know, we’re all “just human.” But that’s not a good excuse is it?

Oh, and for those of you that don’t know- Dai is making progress slowly. He is in stable condition after being in and out of I.C.U.- Brain surgery, menegitis, pnemonia-all sorts of shit. I’m heading down soon to be with him for a week or so. He’s got his own room in a convalescent type place in Marin. It’s got an extra bed and they let me spend the night. I read to him, play cds and try to get him to work on coordinating moving his arms and lets. Slow and steady is better than nothing.

If you’ve read this, more than likely you care. So thanks to you too. Well gonna run and hang with my beautiful Maria and mi Sunshine. Talk to ya soon. Til then. LoveYourBrother. -M.

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