Last Words From The Violently Pacifistic Buddhist Thug… <3

hey all… these are the last blog entries chi made on deftones blog before his accident. luckily i was able to save them after they redesigned their site. if f-bombs offend you just stop reading here. ;) chi is witty, funny… one of a kind and will be forever missed. we all love you brother. rest in peace love. <3

one love for chi,

Hello y'all
First off, I think it important to thank all of you, our amazing supportive fans, for the love and support you have shown us for the past, well fuck...almost twenty years. After 246 shows played in support of Saturday Night Wrist-We took a month off and are now back in our studio writing for what we can only hope will be another great record. I can tell you nothing about it other than we are all very excited and working at a much more efficient pace. Things have been both mellow and exciting at home for me here in Sacto. I’ve been spending most of my time at home with the wife and kid. We also have a chocolate lab pup who has been shitting and pissing all over my new house. She hears the words “fuck” and “no” so much, I’m pretty sure she thinks “fuckno” is her name. My wife got a cool gig modeling for a really cool shop we go to in Sac called The United States Store. If you are curious to see how hot my wife is, you can go online at their website. I also recently got published in the second Revolution On Canvas you’re curious about what a miserable prick I can be when I write, check it out. I will also start posting up poems if you’re at all interested. Otherwise, if you feel so inclined you can write me a semi descent question and there’s a 4% probability that I will reply. Anyhow, I’m cooking Chinese for the woman and must go…Thank you again!
The Violently Pacifistic Buddhist Thug,


Chi(ming) In
Hello again folks.

Thank you all for responding to my stupid rants. I've read all of your blogs and here’s what I gotta say.

First off, Dear Juan – I’m truly sorry that we've become such big pussies and suck now. I’m fairly certain we are only going to suck worse as time progresses so I would recommend you go and buy a Hinder album or something and give up on us. I hear they’re some sorta bad boys of rock, or somethin'. Anyhow, best to jump from this sinking ship while you can.

As for the Buddhists in Burma, like so many other oppressive situations, I am appalled and disgusted by it. I encourage people to write, yell, and scream for change if you feel the same.

This will probably be the one and only time I commend our no talent ass clown of a President, but thank you for recognizing the Dali Lama at the cost of relations with the Chinese. I'm pretty conflicted being both a Buddhist and Chinese.

My wife is at It’s a great place run by great people.

Though I am an English major, I spell like shit and after watching T.V., no I am not smarter than a fifth grader. But, yes, I would love to drag Jeff Foxworthy’s body from my Jeep Wagoner.

I think the Radiohead idea is very innovative and inspirational, but we are still under contract with Warner Brothers. So far I have been very happy with the relationship we share.

What inspires me? Cleaning up my 3 dog's shit and waiting in line at Wal Mart to spend copious amounts of money on animal shit.

I can only remember the last one of horror movies. woman and I are huge horror movie fanatics. Obviously I must list The Exorcist as the scariest of all time, but that’s cause I’m old. I am really looking forward to 30 Days of Night, loved the graphic novel.

All right, I thank you all and will now actually go and devote some time writing music. I have been writing on guitar and really suck. Steph said my performance was…horrible. I think he's right too.

Thanx again,



Hello Cowboys ‘n Cowgirls,

I’ve checked in on y'all again and want to clarify a couple of things. First, the blogs I post are simply statements from my own warped mind and in no way reflect the opinions or beliefs of the other band members. We will never be a political band that feels the need to shove our opinions down your throats. Our music is written because of our love of music and meant to be shared with the hope of everyone being able to enjoy it together regardless of any diversity. That said, I do have strong political beliefs and will on occasion rant because that’s what I feel this is all about. But, I promise never to incorporate that into Deftones. I appreciate your continual support and look forward to touring in front of you as soon as possible.


The Loud Crooked Mouthed Asian-American Commie Pinko Closet Fag

P.s. Fuck George Bush right up his warmongering lying ass



Hello Children,

Now you say, “Hi Chinky Spice.” Say it God damn it. I’m feeling sparky today, sorry. Woke up alone and early. Me & Abe flew down to Burbank yesterday. We will be here in Hollywierd for 3 weeks to continue writing. Apparently it’s been burning down here and it’s not just the usual amount of pollution I am sucking in along with my formaldehyde from Camels. If you’re from here, chances are you’ll probably see me somewhere. I tend to walk, and only the mad, homeless, or drug addled do that here. Try not to run me over again while you are driving around your Lexus whilst talking on the phone and reaching down to tell your Chihuahua “bad doggie” as she shits on your Prada bag. I thought of watching some TV this morning to get caught up and have something to tell you but I simply don’t have the stomach for it. Our TV blew up a couple of weeks ago and I’m kinda outta the loop. All we had was some pirated basic cable downstairs anyway, so I really didn’t miss much. We had a falling out with a certain cable company that sounds like cumcast and I told ‘em to go fuck them selves. So, instead of watching the usual stream of human cruelty on the tube I am listening to Mozart and talking to you. It’s really much more pleasant, well for me I suppose. I bet your getting really tired of hearing from the ‘ol Chinaman and wish someone else in the band would chime in. Me too, too bad you’re stuck with my sorry blogs. So, what’s going on? Y'all have a good Halloween? I did. Took Gabe & colleen trick or treating then handed out candy like nice ‘ol folks. Gabe was a skeleton zombie thing, Colleen was Uma Thurman from Kill Bill, and I was, as per their request, Eric Cartman. I will try to get you photos. Some dumbshit kid called me Stewie though. That’s okay. Cartoons are about all I watch on TV except for Lost, which we are all addicted to. PS, shout out to Jorge Garcia, you’re the bomb Hurley. Thanx for the figure, that’s a fine ass program. It has also brought the band closer as we are all addicted to it and watch it over and over again. Also, got another tattoo from my boy Bao at Hard Luck in Lodi. He's amazing and I love going down there, obviously. Before you ask how many tattoo's I got, the answer is 20 years worth. Miss my beautiful wife & son, but am grateful to be down here trying to finish this up. It’s very exciting and Chino said "snappy”. I also miss my 3 dogs and am sad that one of our ferrets is dying. Pls. pour one out for Alec Baldwin, I don’t think he's gonna make it. Anyhow, I guess I'll go and try to get a life or smoke a cig or something. I hope you had fun and thanx as always for your support.

Gratefully Yours,
Chinky Spice


TUESDAY, JUNE 17, 2008

Cheng Checks In
Hello Campers,

I've been on a personal hiatus and I apologize fer my absence. We've been locked into the studio as you know and are finishing the drum tracks on a song tentatively called "Trempest." Its heavy as fuck with a shitload of groove 'n even though its been driving me crazy as it runs through my insomniatic brain, I am really excited! I always say this shit but I truly believe this album to be well worth the wait and appreciate all your support and kind loyalty. The idea of finishing the album and getting out to play in front of y'all is a nice light at the end of my tunnel. We intend to tour extensively so don't fret. On a person note, I've been holding up 'n out. Went to a tattoo convention to support my boys at hard luck and many many other friends. If your wondering "does he always have more tattoo's than last time I saw him?" - yes, I do. I want to thank anyone who has gotten a tone tat and say it is amazingly flattering. I have finished reading Matt Ruffs "Bad Monkey" and am reading Thomas Pynchons "V-A" book on the history of civilization, and some more Buddhist literature. Took my son to see Iron Man and really enjoyed it. Hit an "X" dead center at 50 yards with my sig pistol. Clean my house, work on music and a little writing and lovin' on Colleen, Gabe and the dogs. Hope to see you all very soon!

my deepest respect as always

P.S. I will now throw the band under the bus and let you know that we are all online playing full tilt poker for fake money. I go by "chetcheng," Chino goes by "chinote," Stef goes by "dodoubleg," and I think and frank is "fmdee." Abe doesn't play games, sorry. If you feel so inclined come 'n see if you can take our money.

one love for chi!

pictures abe c. sent me of the candles he has lit for chi. <3


  1. Thank you Gina for posting these. It meant a lot to be able to read his words as if he were speaking them. His random thoughts are fun to hear. I must that say that while my deepest condolences go out to Gabe, momma J and Coleen as well as the entire family, in my own selfish way I feel relief that there is now closure and mostly that chi is in the eternal beyond and can look down from above or wherever and in a way be with each if them always. He is definitely Gabriel’s angel now, and it’s cool to think that he can see the big picture from his new place and see all the love we have poured out for him for the past five years. I for one, do strongly believe that we will all see him again in heaven. Rest in peace, Chi. You were a cool ass respectable man.
    -Singer family

  2. Lisa Ward |

    Met Chi the summer of 2000 on their White Pony tour and had a chance to talk to him and get to know him at their band party in Chicago. I was so struck by him as a person. He was this start larger than life on stage but a real person with substance and depth… such commitment to his family. He really touched me as a person and the next day I wrote this poem about him. I thought I would share it with his family.


    I see upon the stage
    A Rock God, An Adonis,
    blessed with this incredible aura that stirs the soul.
    As the lights shine upon you
    they illuminate the brilliant star that you are.

    I see you off stage and I am help captive as you speak.
    This Rock God is a legend, yet a principled man.
    But no ordinary man… an extraordinary man.
    For you my friend, are truly the epitome of beautiful.
    God mad you of candy from inside out.

    I stand in awe a your magnificence.
    For your words make my cold heart warm.
    Thank you Chi… my kindred spirit for restoring my faith in men.
    Thank you Chi… my kindred spirit for restoring my faith in man!

    In loving Memory of Chi

    God Bless

    Lisa Ward

  3. Lucy Blankley |

    I can not stop crying, my love and thoughts are with you all.

  4. I just found out Golria Cavalera has a blog page….Please read this, it does in-vol CHI CHENG

  5. Thank you for posting these, a highly entertaining and witty man. Sending love, support and strength to the family, the band and all who have been affected by the passing of this wonderful human being.


  6. I remember reading these blog posts back when they were first posted. It seems so surreal that Chi is gone now. He lives through the music for me.

  7. really heartwarming. great spirit! the music he left for us means sooooooo much to me. His attitude and way of living made me want to be a musician, not a rockstar, a musician. such a genuine soul. to say he’s gonna be missed is an understatement. my heart goes out to Chi’s family and friends. he meant a lot to all of us fans. One Love.

  8. Petered an |

    Chi was the first guy in the band I ever spoke to…I helped him carry some things to the trailer in Lafayette, LA in 1996…he seemed to remember me at shows if our paths were fortunate enough to cross…a genuinely awesome human being…much love and respect

  9. Michele T. Valykeo |

    Never have been offended by the f bomb and
    I don’t know why.

    I don’t drop the f-bomb here, I don’t think I have ever.

    Well, no I wouldn’t drop the f bomb in the middle of a prayer and I pray a lot here… so, okay.

    Thank you for sharing this post.

    Blessings to those who go before
    us where we all have yet to go
    safe journey to them.

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